Date: 2019-06-14 03:33 pm (UTC)
shiningstardust: (so much to say)
From: [personal profile] shiningstardust
It would be foolish to assume that he felt the same sense of loneliness that she did - that he needed the comfort of simple contact like she did, that he had gotten something out of sharing his arm with her as they'd walked back from dinner, even though she knew, logically speaking, that it had mostly been a performative gesture done for the benefit of the pairs of eyes that had surely been watching.

It felt hopeful that they had reached an understanding - and it had been more than she had allowed herself to expect. So at least she felt like she could breathe a little bit and at least most of the smiles she had shared had not been just for show.

She wasn't sure what Joreth was thanking her for, but instead of making a self-deprecating joke or even incredulously asking why, Jyn just nodded and murmured the same. It had been a long day, and she was sure that she was not the only one that needed some rest.

"Sleep well", she offered as she took another step away. Who knew what the next day was going to bring, after all?

hahaha who needs a heart anyway

Date: 2019-06-15 03:22 am (UTC)
shiningstardust: (resigned)
From: [personal profile] shiningstardust
Jyn wasn't a heavy sleeper. At first, the little noises from beyond the door weren't bothersome at all - Joreth had informed her, after all, that he tended to listen to things in order to help him sleep.

But after a while, the noises were too much to ignore - not that Jyn was so callous to ignore someone when they were clearly in pain - and what she heard from the living quarters were desperate and terrified.

She slipped out of bed and pulled her thin robe on, careful as she tiptoed from the bedroom and out toward the couch. Her heart sank as in the dim light, she watched Joreth so tormented by whatever dreams he was having. What was she supposed to do in a situation like this? Was she supposed to let it pass on its own, was she supposed to try to wake him? What would leave him in the least amount of distress?

She couldn't stand to do nothing while he was clearly in pain. Carefully, cautiously, she crept closer, her voice as even as she could make it while she spoke to him in the hopes that it would get through whatever was wreaking havoc in his mind.

"Joreth, it's Jyn - you're having a nightmare", she started, her voice slowly raising in volume the closer she crept. She wouldn't sit next to him, not knowing how he would react to being touched, violently or otherwise. "But I'm here and I want to help you wake up. I'm afraid you might hurt yourself if you don't. If you can hear me, say something. Come on, wake up, you have to wake up. Wake up!"

Date: 2019-06-15 04:17 am (UTC)
shiningstardust: (all the way)
From: [personal profile] shiningstardust
She was there, sleep-rumpled but mostly concerned for her husband. Thankfully, though, it didn't take much more effort to cut through whatever dreams (memories) were tormenting him. He stilled, and other than the sound of his breathing for a long moment, all was quiet.

He turned his head to take her in, and Jyn felt a wave of relief wash over her - that was a good sign, right, that he was coherent and cognizant and safe from whatever he had been afraid of.

"Oh, thank the Force", she breathed, hardly even thinking about the implication of the words, shaking her head as he apologized, as though there was anything to apologize for. "It's alright", she tried to soothe, awkwardly, unsure of what she was allowed to do or to say, but wanting to help out somehow. "I'm here. You're going to be okay."

Date: 2019-06-15 04:35 am (UTC)
shiningstardust: (so much to say)
From: [personal profile] shiningstardust
She wanted, momentarily, to invite him into her (their) bed, find a way to curl up close enough to offer comfort, and fall asleep in an effort to get some rest while it was still late enough (early enough?) to do so.

But she didn't know him, and didn't know that if he would see it as patronizing to extend the offer.

"Not as far as I could tell", she replied, taking a seat at the end of the couch, a soft sigh escaping her lips "Just - just noises."

Date: 2019-06-15 04:55 am (UTC)
shiningstardust: (i hear you)
From: [personal profile] shiningstardust
"You don't have to thank you", she murmured, shrugging gently. "You would have done the same for me."

Did she believe that he was alright? Not a chance. But she also didn't want to make a wrong move, whether that was insisting that she stay for a little while, or ask if he wanted to come to bed, or ... any number of possibilities she found herself considering.

"You didn't ruin my night. I can - I can stay out here if you want to take the bed for a bit I don't mind, really."

Date: 2019-06-15 05:34 am (UTC)
shiningstardust: (soft)
From: [personal profile] shiningstardust
Jyn was silent for a long - probably almost too-long moment. At first, she didn't offer an answer other than the soft, slow nodding of her head. It's not that she was uncomfortable with the idea of sharing! She was just surprised, that's all, and maybe it was because she was still hazy with sleep, or maybe it was due to his earlier insistence that the couch would be fine ...

But as she slowly offered her hand, it was with a steady expression that was more akin to and understanding and an acceptance rather than any sort of pity. She had nightmares, too, not that he could know, and sometimes ...

Well. She had woken up disoriented and scared, too, too many times to recall. Maybe knowing that he wasn't alone would help. And sharing a bed seemed such a simple thing to do.

"Yeah", she replied, quickly licking her dry lips. "We can do that."

Date: 2019-06-15 05:57 am (UTC)
shiningstardust: (all the way)
From: [personal profile] shiningstardust
Jyn could be cold. Her words could (and had) cut others directly to the bone. She could be impatient and she could easily say all the right things, even if she didn't mean them. She had to, sometimes, just to get through some days. But she wasn't acting now.

She simply - gently - squeezed Joreth's hand reassuringly. No, this was not exactly what most people expected of a first night as a married couple, but if he was in distress, she was not going to make it worse.

"We'll manage", she replied. "Grab your pillow, we'll go lay down."

Date: 2019-06-15 06:03 am (UTC)
shiningstardust: (soft)
From: [personal profile] shiningstardust
Jyn smiled, too. She smiled and took a deep breath as he set to retrieving the pillow and blanket, and then took the first few steps away from the couch and toward the bedroom. Surely, it couldn't be that difficult. It was only sleep.

Date: 2019-06-15 06:16 am (UTC)
shiningstardust: (she could have been beautiful)
From: [personal profile] shiningstardust
Jyn sighed once they were in the bedroom, and turned her attention to undoing her thin robe and shrugging out of it, leaving her in loose pants and a sleeveless shirt, careful as she sat and tried to watch Joreth without being obvious that she was (still) checking up on him. "It's fine", she murmured, nodding gently. "When you're ready."

Soft. She wasn't used to being so ... soft. But the situation called for it, she felt, and so, she would try.

Date: 2019-06-15 06:51 am (UTC)
shiningstardust: (she could have been beautiful)
From: [personal profile] shiningstardust
Jyn made sure that every movement she made was careful and deliberate in an attempt to keep from startling him all the more. So she slid back underneath her blanket and stretched out in bed - a little closer to the edge than she would normally sleep, and laid on her back, even though she knew that once she slipped back into sleep, she would turn onto her side.

She felt that turning her back to Joreth would feel dismissive, which she did not want. But she also felt that turning the other way and facing him would feel a little too ... intimate. So, for the moment, this would have to do.

The last thing on her mind was anything other than getting a few more hours of sleep. What kind of a monster would she be to make an attempt to initiate now? No, that wasn't her, and this wasn't that, and all she wanted to do - if Joreth was amenable - was to try to offer him some sense of comfort.

...

She didn't know if she would be able to refrain, even in sleep, from reaching out to touch, a hand, an arm, just to maintain some contact, a physical reminder that he wasn't alone.

"Is ... this good?"

Date: 2019-06-15 07:23 am (UTC)
shiningstardust: (all the way)
From: [personal profile] shiningstardust
"Don't."

Jyn followed suit, sitting up in order to face him more fully. Even in the dim light of the room, she wanted him to see her face, watch her expressions, and know that whatever she said, she meant, and nothing was being offered in an attempt to placate.

Wasn't honesty the best policy?

"Everybody needs somebody sometime, Joreth. We shouldn't have to ... go through everything alone. I - haven't had a hug in ages. Maybe years. And to be quite honest ... if that did happen, I'm pretty sure I would welcome it."

She ducked her head, huffing out an embarrassed chuckle, and then slowly glanced back up. "If we're going to be friends, we'll need to trust each other. So this is me saying that I trust you. I trust that you'll tell me if you're uncomfortable, and I hope that you can trust me to do the same. You don't have to go back to the couch - the bed is big enough for us both."

Date: 2019-06-15 05:17 pm (UTC)
shiningstardust: (soft)
From: [personal profile] shiningstardust
Jyn waited, watching, barely breathing. She wondered what he had seen - what he had done - to cause such trauma, fear and pain and whatever else he was experiencing, but it was hardly her place to ask.

She might never know, but at the very least, she could offer some sense of comfort and safety. She would be everything she hated if she did anything less.

Jyn settled back down only after Joreth did, quiet as she offered the hint of a smile, and then slowly slid her hand across the bed, an offering - she wouldn't feel offended if he didn't take it. Maybe it would help to ground him. Maybe it wouldn't. But hopefully it wouldn't hurt to try.

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