Date: 2019-06-15 04:55 am (UTC)
shiningstardust: (i hear you)
From: [personal profile] shiningstardust
"You don't have to thank you", she murmured, shrugging gently. "You would have done the same for me."

Did she believe that he was alright? Not a chance. But she also didn't want to make a wrong move, whether that was insisting that she stay for a little while, or ask if he wanted to come to bed, or ... any number of possibilities she found herself considering.

"You didn't ruin my night. I can - I can stay out here if you want to take the bed for a bit I don't mind, really."

Date: 2019-06-15 05:34 am (UTC)
shiningstardust: (soft)
From: [personal profile] shiningstardust
Jyn was silent for a long - probably almost too-long moment. At first, she didn't offer an answer other than the soft, slow nodding of her head. It's not that she was uncomfortable with the idea of sharing! She was just surprised, that's all, and maybe it was because she was still hazy with sleep, or maybe it was due to his earlier insistence that the couch would be fine ...

But as she slowly offered her hand, it was with a steady expression that was more akin to and understanding and an acceptance rather than any sort of pity. She had nightmares, too, not that he could know, and sometimes ...

Well. She had woken up disoriented and scared, too, too many times to recall. Maybe knowing that he wasn't alone would help. And sharing a bed seemed such a simple thing to do.

"Yeah", she replied, quickly licking her dry lips. "We can do that."

Date: 2019-06-15 05:57 am (UTC)
shiningstardust: (all the way)
From: [personal profile] shiningstardust
Jyn could be cold. Her words could (and had) cut others directly to the bone. She could be impatient and she could easily say all the right things, even if she didn't mean them. She had to, sometimes, just to get through some days. But she wasn't acting now.

She simply - gently - squeezed Joreth's hand reassuringly. No, this was not exactly what most people expected of a first night as a married couple, but if he was in distress, she was not going to make it worse.

"We'll manage", she replied. "Grab your pillow, we'll go lay down."

Date: 2019-06-15 06:03 am (UTC)
shiningstardust: (soft)
From: [personal profile] shiningstardust
Jyn smiled, too. She smiled and took a deep breath as he set to retrieving the pillow and blanket, and then took the first few steps away from the couch and toward the bedroom. Surely, it couldn't be that difficult. It was only sleep.

Date: 2019-06-15 06:16 am (UTC)
shiningstardust: (she could have been beautiful)
From: [personal profile] shiningstardust
Jyn sighed once they were in the bedroom, and turned her attention to undoing her thin robe and shrugging out of it, leaving her in loose pants and a sleeveless shirt, careful as she sat and tried to watch Joreth without being obvious that she was (still) checking up on him. "It's fine", she murmured, nodding gently. "When you're ready."

Soft. She wasn't used to being so ... soft. But the situation called for it, she felt, and so, she would try.

Date: 2019-06-15 06:51 am (UTC)
shiningstardust: (she could have been beautiful)
From: [personal profile] shiningstardust
Jyn made sure that every movement she made was careful and deliberate in an attempt to keep from startling him all the more. So she slid back underneath her blanket and stretched out in bed - a little closer to the edge than she would normally sleep, and laid on her back, even though she knew that once she slipped back into sleep, she would turn onto her side.

She felt that turning her back to Joreth would feel dismissive, which she did not want. But she also felt that turning the other way and facing him would feel a little too ... intimate. So, for the moment, this would have to do.

The last thing on her mind was anything other than getting a few more hours of sleep. What kind of a monster would she be to make an attempt to initiate now? No, that wasn't her, and this wasn't that, and all she wanted to do - if Joreth was amenable - was to try to offer him some sense of comfort.

...

She didn't know if she would be able to refrain, even in sleep, from reaching out to touch, a hand, an arm, just to maintain some contact, a physical reminder that he wasn't alone.

"Is ... this good?"

Date: 2019-06-15 07:23 am (UTC)
shiningstardust: (all the way)
From: [personal profile] shiningstardust
"Don't."

Jyn followed suit, sitting up in order to face him more fully. Even in the dim light of the room, she wanted him to see her face, watch her expressions, and know that whatever she said, she meant, and nothing was being offered in an attempt to placate.

Wasn't honesty the best policy?

"Everybody needs somebody sometime, Joreth. We shouldn't have to ... go through everything alone. I - haven't had a hug in ages. Maybe years. And to be quite honest ... if that did happen, I'm pretty sure I would welcome it."

She ducked her head, huffing out an embarrassed chuckle, and then slowly glanced back up. "If we're going to be friends, we'll need to trust each other. So this is me saying that I trust you. I trust that you'll tell me if you're uncomfortable, and I hope that you can trust me to do the same. You don't have to go back to the couch - the bed is big enough for us both."

Date: 2019-06-15 05:17 pm (UTC)
shiningstardust: (soft)
From: [personal profile] shiningstardust
Jyn waited, watching, barely breathing. She wondered what he had seen - what he had done - to cause such trauma, fear and pain and whatever else he was experiencing, but it was hardly her place to ask.

She might never know, but at the very least, she could offer some sense of comfort and safety. She would be everything she hated if she did anything less.

Jyn settled back down only after Joreth did, quiet as she offered the hint of a smile, and then slowly slid her hand across the bed, an offering - she wouldn't feel offended if he didn't take it. Maybe it would help to ground him. Maybe it wouldn't. But hopefully it wouldn't hurt to try.

Date: 2019-06-16 12:11 am (UTC)
shiningstardust: (soft)
From: [personal profile] shiningstardust
Jyn finally let the last vestiges of stress and worry go in the instant that their fingers touched and she felt some little spark pass between them. Maybe it was just her imagination, maybe it was exhaustion, but she thought she felt something nonetheless.

"Good night, again", she repeated, just as softly. "Sleep well."

Date: 2019-06-16 01:54 am (UTC)
shiningstardust: (soft)
From: [personal profile] shiningstardust
"Good", Jyn murmured, offering another gentle, fleeting squeeze of fingers still in her grasp. "I hope you do, really."

She didn't know if she would, but if she was lucky, and barring any more unexpected wakeups, maybe she could get a few more hours.

Date: 2019-06-16 02:55 am (UTC)
shiningstardust: (soft)
From: [personal profile] shiningstardust
For once, the silence of the room didn't feel stifling. For once, Jyn didn't find herself consumed in her own thoughts. She closed her eyes and relaxed into the decadently plush pillows. Even if she didn't fall asleep quickly, she could take comfort in the contact - and selfishly, how good it felt for her not to be alone.

Her heartbeat and her breathing steadied, and a little at a time, fell back into rest, even though she wasn't quite sleeping yet. Just on the verge, she felt the motion of the bed and the traveling of his hand to her shoulder, and she hummed her response. "Mmhmm. 'S fine."

Date: 2019-06-16 03:53 am (UTC)
shiningstardust: (she could have been beautiful)
From: [personal profile] shiningstardust
Jyn kept still, allowing Joreth to position himself - and her - however was the most comfortable for them both. When all was settled and she found herself clutched to his chest, her face fitting perfectly in the space between shoulder and neck.

Now, she was a little more awake, barely breathing for fear of displacing either of them - Jyn had never shared space with another person quite like this, and even her last familial hugs had happened so long ago ...

Maybe it was selfish, but she didn't want to have to move anytime soon. She wanted to stay here, right here for as long as she could. Tentatively, she let her fingers drift from his shoulder to his back and began tracing nondescript little patterns there, hoping he'd derive even more comfort from the reassuring gesture.

She closed her eyes and took in his warmth, how solid and real he was, how ... safe she felt within the confines of his embrace. Whatever she was expecting to feel ... it wasn't this.

"Better?", she asked, her voice soft, hesitant.

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Cassian Andor

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