candor1: (Yavin . andamiada . rebelde)
Cassian Andor ([personal profile] candor1) wrote2018-05-23 12:12 am
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wherehopegoes: (Default)

[personal profile] wherehopegoes 2019-07-18 09:02 am (UTC)(link)
Jyn could feel the hitch in Cassian's breath, the shaking of his shoulders and knew that he must have been crying, but there was little she could do in the way of comfort other than continue holding him, being there for whatever he needed from her.

Consolation was not a skill that she was very practiced with, after all. So she kept still, and she held him, and she allowed him time to get it out, no pushing for him to talk about what he was feeling, but offering an ear, a shoulder should he feel safe enough to.

She made a softly distressed little noise when he apologized and wished he knew without her having to say that he never had to apologize for feeling how he felt. "You don't have to explain."
wherehopegoes: (Default)

[personal profile] wherehopegoes 2019-07-18 10:33 am (UTC)(link)
I'm here.

Now, she rubbed her thumb reassuringly against his side, only closing her eyes once she was sure that all Cassian really needed was time to let whatever was afflicting him to pass. He pulled her closer and she allowed it, still quiet, still waiting for permission, spoken or otherwise, to break the silence between them.

"I'd say you're a little overdue - ", she murmured, slowly opening her eyes, turning her head just so that she could observe Cassian more closely. "How are you feeling now?"
wherehopegoes: (observing)

[personal profile] wherehopegoes 2019-07-19 03:52 am (UTC)(link)
Jyn thought she understood completely. She didn't have to hide behind an alias with Cassian, and now, she knew that she didn't have to hide her feelings either - because he felt the same. "Like - ", she began, her brow furrowing slightly as she tried to find the right words, "I can breathe when I'm with you."

She met his eyes, an understanding clear in her gaze, even as she took another moment just to breathe, recalling the beach, holding each other tight, and feeling nothing but peace as she waited for the end to come. "Yeah. I was - I wasn't ... scared I had you and I felt ... still."
wherehopegoes: (w. cassian ; here at the end of all thin)

[personal profile] wherehopegoes 2019-07-19 02:59 pm (UTC)(link)
Just like now. She could just be with Cassian. She could breathe, and do nothing more than simply feel content with him, all wrapped up in the relative quiet. It was ... enough.
Edited 2019-07-19 15:00 (UTC)
wherehopegoes: (w. cassian ; welcome home)

[personal profile] wherehopegoes 2019-07-25 06:51 am (UTC)(link)
There was still so much to talk about, and Jyn hoped that they would have enough time to share it all. Maybe not all at once, but eventually. Especially not now, while they were quiet and tired (in all the best ways), warm and wrapped up with each other.

Not while they had the time to do little but enjoy having the time to be together, if they talked more or if they didn't, if they fell asleep or simply relished in a peace neither had known since they were children.
wherehopegoes: (looking up ; memories)

[personal profile] wherehopegoes 2019-07-25 03:44 pm (UTC)(link)
[ooc: Of course! Whatever option strikes your fancy, I'll go with.]
wherehopegoes: (what is happening)

[personal profile] wherehopegoes 2019-08-01 01:57 pm (UTC)(link)
Jyn was no strangers to nightmares. More often than not, she woke up a panting, sweating mess after having found herself back on Lah'mu, Jedha, Scarif, any number of other places that she had borne witness to or been part of terrible, terrible things.

But lying tangled up with Cassian, she found the type of rest that she never thought possible - blessedly free from nightmares. She woke suddenly, pulled from her dreamless sleep by a blood-chilling scream, almost tossed from the little bed by Cassian's wildly flailing arms and legs.

Still, she held her ground as she tried to wake him from whatever hellscape he was trapped inside. She couldn't hold him down - he'd fight back. She couldn't be gentle, either, othewise he'd never hear her.

"Cassian!", she sharply cried, shaking him with force. Not too roughly, not to hurt him, but to jolt him out of sleep and back with her. "Wake up! Whatever you're seeing, it's not real. I'm here, wake up, wake up, wake up!"
wherehopegoes: (wild ; trapped)

[personal profile] wherehopegoes 2019-08-04 06:34 am (UTC)(link)
Jyn pulled away then, but kept her concerned gaze trained squarely on Cassian, how rigid his body went, how he searched for something - anything to defend himself from whatever what was plaguing him ... the tightly clenched fist and the way he trembled as he held back from using it against an unseen assailant.

But she didn't hesitate when it came to answering his panicked question, shaking her head vehemently. "No. No, love, you didn't hit me. You were moving around so much I thought you might fall right out of bed. And - you were screaming. Are you alright? What happened?"
wherehopegoes: (emotional)

[personal profile] wherehopegoes 2019-08-05 03:24 am (UTC)(link)
Jyn wouldn't have held it against Cassian, anyway. Nightmares could sometimes feel ... frighteningly real, she knew that very well and he would never hurt her, she was absolutely certain. She kept still but welcomed him close, sighing softly as he held her steady (and she hopefully offered him the same). "You were sleeping. And you don't have to apologize, I - I know what it's like to have nightmares. Sometimes, they feel ... "
wherehopegoes: (taken aback)

[personal profile] wherehopegoes 2019-08-05 04:31 am (UTC)(link)
Nothing more needed to be said about the nightmares if Cassian didn't wish to discuss them. Jyn had been there before and would be there again. She knew what it was like, the terror they could inspire.

Cassian took her into his arms, pulled her close, took solace in the warmth of her body, and for a long moment, she said nothing, simply curled her arms around him, too, hopefully sharing with him the comfort and stability that he needed from her.

"It's not all you can do, Cassian. I know that you've been used as a weapon against your will, but - you spared my father when it had been your duty to do exactly the opposite. You came back for me time and time again when you could've left me to die. You are no monster, Cassian Andor, and you are capable of so much good, even if you don't see it right now. I love you, I trust you, I know you would never hurt me."
wherehopegoes: (w. cassian ; here at the end of all thin)

[personal profile] wherehopegoes 2019-08-05 06:02 am (UTC)(link)
He most likely still felt too shaken and too raw in the wake of his nightmares to think very clearly. Hells, Jyn was barely awake and coherent herself, but what she told Cassian was absolutely the honest truth.

And for as afraid as he was, she was all the more determined to prove that she wasn't.

She couldn't begin to say what the future would hold for them, but she was absolutely certain that Cassian would never knowingly harm her. And while she didn't know how to reassure him of that, she was doing her best to try.

"Okay. Okay. It's alright, Cassian, I'm here and I'm fine. You're here and you're going to be fine, too. I'm not going anywhere."
wherehopegoes: (w. cassian ; here at the end of all thin)

[personal profile] wherehopegoes 2019-08-12 03:06 pm (UTC)(link)
Jyn wasn't entirely certain that she would be able to get back to sleep in the wake of Cassian's nightmare. But she returned the kiss, and settled back with him, and curled in close in order to give and receive comfort and try to help him find some rest, at least. She couldn't say that her presence would help, but she hoped, even in the smallest way, that it did.

She didn't think she was particularly skilled at being a partner, but as she settled a gentle palm against his chest, right above his heart, a reminder that he wasn't alone. She pressed a kiss to his shoulder and murmured "I love you" right against his skin.