Jyn clutched at Cassian as wave after wave of sensation washed over her, each one a little less powerful than the last, stealing her breath and her strength. But Cassian held her tight and kept her safe and as she came back to herself a little at at a time, her grip lessened.
Slowly, she trailed her fingertips along the line of his shoulders, what little breath she had catching in her throat to hear the whispered sentiment - not claiming, but true nonetheless. She had willingly given Cassian her heart, her soul, whatever else she was made of. She was his.
[I'm so sorry I fell off the face of the planet, there! Any interest in continuing? Or starting something new? Or time-jumping from where we were? Sorry again!]
He'd never welcomed the sound of his own name before. …On the rare occasions when it was even his real name. But from Jyn, it made him again press his face into her neck and not try to hide the glad tears in his eyes.
His body still jutted rigidly into hers, but there was no demand, no urgency, to it. He both wanted her and would happily hold her with no further action, forever.
Jyn had said it before, and she would say it again, as few or as many times as Cassian needed to hear it - she knew who he was, she knew what he'd done, she knew what he was trying to come to terms with and heal from, and she accepted him for who he was, unconditionally.
Her hands were still a bit shaky, but she wanted to reassure him somehow, so she settled for running gentle fingertips along his bare arm, slowly, a reminder that she was there, that she wasn't going anywhere.
She was in no real hurry, either, since Cassian had said it himself, there were a few short hours in which neither of them was expected anywhere, but stars, she wanted to give him the same pleasure that he so selflessly had given her.
His skin prickled in the wake of her hand. He pressed another kiss to her cheek before letting his head fall back beside hers, all his muscles loose and relaxed. He was more comfortable in her embrace than he usually was in his own skin.
He murmured something in another language into her hair, his tone of voice making clear the meaning: gratitude, safety, adoration. I feel there's home with you.
Every motion of her hand was so careful, so deliberate, ultimately designed to help Cassian find some rest and relaxation. Jyn knew very well how difficult it was for him to find, either, and if she could help him to do so - while allowing her the luxury, as well - she could be patient as a little at a time, he let those walls down.
She didn't have to know what he said to discern the meaning of the words - and she felt exactly the same. Home didn't necessarily have to be a place, it could be a person instead. And she was certain that she had found hers in Cassian.
"Do you want to lay back down for a while? We have time."
"We have time," he repeated. And it was no less miraculous now than when they'd been rescued from Scarif. They were alive, and they had time.
He tangled his arm with hers so his fingertips on her skin could mimic hers on his; and gently drew circuitry on her forearm for some quiet, peaceful minutes.
Jyn couldn't say just how much time she and Cassian had been gifted, but she knew that she didn't want to waste any more of it needlessly. No more hiding, not anymore.
She sighed as she rested against Cassian's side, enjoying each brush of his fingertips against her skin as they allowed the quiet to overtake them. And while she didn't want to disturb the sanctity of the moment, eventually, she turned her head to press a kiss to his cheek, her voice a gentle whisper when she asked - "Do you want to lay down with me?"
Exhaling a laugh, he reached under them both to tug the bunched up blankets out of the way, bracing his other elbow where they'd been propped up against the pillows to help shift them both further down, where they could lay flat.
He tugged the blanket a little over her feet before abandoning it, letting his hand drift up and come to rest on her stomach.
She loved the laugh, and she loved the way that it made her feel. Momentarily without worry, so warm, so proud that she had been the cause of it. And even though it had been her idea in the first place, she uttered a displeased little groan once the time came for them to actually move.
Still, once they were lying down, though, once they were tangling limbs together and getting closer than before, she felt content again, a contentness that she had never known before. And that was all due to the man at her side.
His hand pressed, gently, flat against her, and slid across her stomach, around her ribs, into the small of her back, massaging her there gently like he was kneading her from clay. Their fronts pressed together once again, and he moved his lips to hers.
He was still so careful with her, even though this was not the first time they'd shared his bunk together, still touched her so reverently, still treated her like she was made of something precious and fragile and she sighed shakily as she closed her eyes and welcomed the press of his lips to hers.
She felt safe there - safe and warm and cared for. Wanted in a way that she had never known before. And as she curled her arms around Cassian in return, she hoped that he felt exactly the same. "Let's not get up until we absolutely have to, yeah?", she mumbled, tilting her chin just enough to allow her to press a kiss to his cheek.
"Deal," he murmured back. One of his hands strayed up her back to comb his fingers into her hair, and he closed his eyes to appreciate the kiss and breathe in her scent.
They didn't have the luxury of staying for very long, but she was grateful that they were going to enjoy what little time they could take for themselves. She wormed her fingers underneath his shirt, gentle, careful fingertips blazing a trail up and down the length of his back.
Jyn didn't ignore it, though, and she attempted to subtly lift her hips, press against Cassian all the further, an acknowledgement, an acceptance, a promise that she intended to keep all at once. "Do you want me?", she breathed, even though she already knew what the answer would be.
She shivered, her fingers clutching Cassian a little tighter, holding him a little closer, her stomach twisting pleasantly to hear Cassian reply in the affirmative.
Stars, she wanted him, too, all the time, an enduring, constant ache.
"Please - ", she asked, the word tinged with others - I'm yours and always and I love you I love you I love you.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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Slowly, she trailed her fingertips along the line of his shoulders, what little breath she had catching in her throat to hear the whispered sentiment - not claiming, but true nonetheless. She had willingly given Cassian her heart, her soul, whatever else she was made of. She was his.
"My Cassian."
ooc note
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His body still jutted rigidly into hers, but there was no demand, no urgency, to it. He both wanted her and would happily hold her with no further action, forever.
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Her hands were still a bit shaky, but she wanted to reassure him somehow, so she settled for running gentle fingertips along his bare arm, slowly, a reminder that she was there, that she wasn't going anywhere.
She was in no real hurry, either, since Cassian had said it himself, there were a few short hours in which neither of them was expected anywhere, but stars, she wanted to give him the same pleasure that he so selflessly had given her.
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He murmured something in another language into her hair, his tone of voice making clear the meaning: gratitude, safety, adoration. I feel there's home with you.
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She didn't have to know what he said to discern the meaning of the words - and she felt exactly the same. Home didn't necessarily have to be a place, it could be a person instead. And she was certain that she had found hers in Cassian.
"Do you want to lay back down for a while? We have time."
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He tangled his arm with hers so his fingertips on her skin could mimic hers on his; and gently drew circuitry on her forearm for some quiet, peaceful minutes.
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She sighed as she rested against Cassian's side, enjoying each brush of his fingertips against her skin as they allowed the quiet to overtake them. And while she didn't want to disturb the sanctity of the moment, eventually, she turned her head to press a kiss to his cheek, her voice a gentle whisper when she asked - "Do you want to lay down with me?"
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He tugged the blanket a little over her feet before abandoning it, letting his hand drift up and come to rest on her stomach.
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Still, once they were lying down, though, once they were tangling limbs together and getting closer than before, she felt content again, a contentness that she had never known before. And that was all due to the man at her side.
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"Yes," he breathed.
She may have been the first partner he'd ever had that he actually wanted.
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Stars, she wanted him, too, all the time, an enduring, constant ache.
"Please - ", she asked, the word tinged with others - I'm yours and always and I love you I love you I love you.
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holy broken coding batman! in my defense, i was really very tired last night
Aww! No worries!